Things that Have Never Happened to Me

If we loved each other

I would lie next to you & ask what happened before I was in your life.

You would smile & say something flattering like,

"I don't remember anything before you."

The next day I would remember this anecdote & report it to all my friends.
They would respond with positive noises & tell me how lucky we are to have each other.

But before that,

You would tell me the story of your life because you trusted me.

Because we shared a strong sense of camaraderie neither one ever knew existed before because it wasn't ever attained in the years prior.

You would spare no detail & confess every humiliating moment you endured that still clings to your psyche like cobwebs.

I would hang on every word.

Reacting appropriately to every important plot point; saying things like,

"Did you really say that?"

"Thats fucked up."

"I know just what you mean!"

Congratulating you on making it this far due to all of your awful circumstances.

I would marvel at the plethora of new information while you cued my story in return.

You would listen intently, returning my enthusiasm & only laughing when you were supposed to.

The conversation would end with laughter through tears.

I'd think to myself how much money I'd saved on the years of therapy this moment quelled.

While wiping our faces with the backs of our hands we'd be beaming; our eyes would meet & we would see the gravity of this rare event.
We'd embrace one another.

It'd feel so powerful to know every meaty-dirty-beautiful-tragic truth about a person.

As we lie together, still,

Naked.
Both figuratively & literally,

the warm feeling of intimacy lulls us into a sturdy, dreamless sleep.

But we aren't in love
& we wake up alone.